---
product_id: 48903662
title: "The State Of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity - a book for anyone who has ever loved"
price: "104.54 DT"
currency: TND
in_stock: true
reviews_count: 13
url: https://www.desertcart.tn/products/48903662-the-state-of-affairs-rethinking-infidelity-a-book-for-anyone
store_origin: TN
region: Tunisia
---

# The State Of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity - a book for anyone who has ever loved

**Price:** 104.54 DT
**Availability:** ✅ In Stock

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- **What is this?** The State Of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity - a book for anyone who has ever loved
- **How much does it cost?** 104.54 DT with free shipping
- **Is it available?** Yes, in stock and ready to ship
- **Where can I buy it?** [www.desertcart.tn](https://www.desertcart.tn/products/48903662-the-state-of-affairs-rethinking-infidelity-a-book-for-anyone)

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## Description

***NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER*** Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Why do people cheat? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Infidelity is the ultimate betrayal. But does it have to be? Relationship therapist Esther Perel examines why people cheat, and unpacks why affairs are so traumatic; because they threaten our emotional security. In infidelity, she sees something unexpected - an expression of longing and loss. A must-read for anyone who has ever cheated or been cheated on, or who simply wants a new framework for understanding relationships. 'Esther Perel does nothing short of strip us of our deepest biases, remind us of our purpose in connecting as lovers, and save relationships that might otherwise sink into the sea-all with even-handed wisdom, fresh morality, and wise prose. Thank heavens for this woman.' - Lena Dunham 'Beautiful. A brilliantly intelligent plea for complexity, understanding, and - as always - kindness.' - Alain de Botton 'She's the guru on relationships... she's the first person I ask for advice' - Cara Delevingne 'Wisest sex therapist we ever did meet. Her new book, THE STATE OF AFFAIRS , proposes a new perspective on infidelity' - GRAZIA 'This is a must-have for all married couples and has completely changed my thinking.' - SUNDAY TIMES STYLE

Review: A state of relationships - This book written by a psychotherapist and counsellor who has worked with couples will be of interest to anyone interested in relationships. It is also well written with an good narrative flow. At the beginning of the book Esther Peel looks at the conventional wisdom on partnerships and marriages and fidelity in them. She points out that in Western society there are strong views that partners in these are expected to stay loyal to each other, with out straying elsewhere for intimacy and sex. She does not appear to have problems with this per se, but points out there are many divergences form this path. It is human nature to transgress boundaries, even if this is painful. What follows are a large number of accounts of cases she has encountered. This includes infidelity in conventional marriages, both homo- and hetro- sexual partnerships, open relationships (where issues of infidelity can crop up despite there being a permission to find additional partnerships) as well as ones that insist on monogamy. She looks also at issues of betrayal, the pain of discovery of an affair, how some affairs may save people from bad partnerships and also how that affairs may sometimes (paradoxically?) even save and strengthen relationships. Perel also looks at the various kind of people involved, apparently settled people, those who prefer to have affairs rather than stay in a single one. All in all the range of people discussed here is wide. Perel's aim is not to discredit monogamy, but to suggest what is needed is a little more space for people in their situations to work through. At one point in the narrative she ponders on the general state of knowledge around human sexuality. As she states it is limited. This book contributes to expanding that space a little more. An enlightening read.
Review: A must read - kind and insightful - Esther Perel’s voice regarding loving relationships is vital for our times. She speaks with the wisdom of someone who has a depth of understanding and kindness that few (if any) can match. This book affirmed many conclusions I had reached on my own about love and commitment over a very painful period. Esther’s writing is pertinent and very engaging. Had I read her book in advance, I might have had the armoury, the understanding and the confidence to ‘stray from the script’ and find happiness much sooner. Highly recommended reading.

## Technical Specifications

| Specification | Value |
|---------------|-------|
| Best Sellers Rank | 375,796 in Books ( See Top 100 in Books ) 1 in Psychology of Sexuality 9 in Psychology & Sexual Behaviour 17 in Marriage Relationships |
| Customer Reviews | 4.6 out of 5 stars 5,572 Reviews |

## Images

![The State Of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity - a book for anyone who has ever loved - Image 1](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/71BfNybi7PL.jpg)

## Customer Reviews

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ A state of relationships
*by G***Y on 10 September 2018*

This book written by a psychotherapist and counsellor who has worked with couples will be of interest to anyone interested in relationships. It is also well written with an good narrative flow. At the beginning of the book Esther Peel looks at the conventional wisdom on partnerships and marriages and fidelity in them. She points out that in Western society there are strong views that partners in these are expected to stay loyal to each other, with out straying elsewhere for intimacy and sex. She does not appear to have problems with this per se, but points out there are many divergences form this path. It is human nature to transgress boundaries, even if this is painful. What follows are a large number of accounts of cases she has encountered. This includes infidelity in conventional marriages, both homo- and hetro- sexual partnerships, open relationships (where issues of infidelity can crop up despite there being a permission to find additional partnerships) as well as ones that insist on monogamy. She looks also at issues of betrayal, the pain of discovery of an affair, how some affairs may save people from bad partnerships and also how that affairs may sometimes (paradoxically?) even save and strengthen relationships. Perel also looks at the various kind of people involved, apparently settled people, those who prefer to have affairs rather than stay in a single one. All in all the range of people discussed here is wide. Perel's aim is not to discredit monogamy, but to suggest what is needed is a little more space for people in their situations to work through. At one point in the narrative she ponders on the general state of knowledge around human sexuality. As she states it is limited. This book contributes to expanding that space a little more. An enlightening read.

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ A must read - kind and insightful
*by J***T on 17 February 2018*

Esther Perel’s voice regarding loving relationships is vital for our times. She speaks with the wisdom of someone who has a depth of understanding and kindness that few (if any) can match. This book affirmed many conclusions I had reached on my own about love and commitment over a very painful period. Esther’s writing is pertinent and very engaging. Had I read her book in advance, I might have had the armoury, the understanding and the confidence to ‘stray from the script’ and find happiness much sooner. Highly recommended reading.

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐ A good guide to the modern marriage...
*by C***H on 19 April 2024*

An interesting book, full of wisdom and guidance about relationships and how marriages can go wrong. I don't feel like I gained a huge amount of new knowledge from reading this book, but a few things I picked up along the way certainly clarified my thinking - or supported what I had previously thought, but wasn't sure was the right way to look at a certain phenomenon.

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*Product available on Desertcart Tunisia*
*Store origin: TN*
*Last updated: 2026-08-20*